A collection of bits and pieces of poems and short stories. Sometimes a note or two about things that I find inspiring.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
Scent
The bed without you in it
is a shadow of itself
the still-warm indentation
bore your soul within a smell
of cologne rubbed on your body
but more poignantly the musk
that you decided to hide
under a falser scent of lust.
21st Century Soldiers
You returned from voluntary duty
from wars that can’t be won
you look to me in askance
because I refuse to praise what you’ve done.
The blood that stains your hands
is no different from mine
you took lives of women and children
whose country you’d overrun.
I refuse to thank the veterans
of wars I find unjust
you may find this cruel
but no one ever asked them-
their sacrifice, their loss.
Cupped Hand, Upturned Palm
We walk with cupped hand
And upturned palm
dipping down to taste
Water from the mouth of a river
Poised under the shreds of dawn.
The salt tang
of mingled blood: two bodies
rushing into one another
River flowing into a sea
that pushes waves
Back against clear cut divisions
Of where one ends
And the other begins.
Ache Extraordinaire
muscles long buried under the layer of disuse that was once known as fat grind to a pitiful start, harden into a shape intended for its original purpose: to toil. to sweat. to ache. and then to feel the ordinary turned beautiful. rest after physical demands are stretched becomes paradise. Merely sitting or laying a forgotten fantasy rediscovered. To rinse the day away with a warm shower, soothing exhausted muscles that were pulled from their extended vacation of modern life into a world that still relies on physical strength.
this is what we were made for: sweat wrung from the body, to purify the mind.
The Lights they shine…
So much brighter
when the days
falter.
The candle flames they burn
so much stronger
when the night
comes sooner.
Your love it lasts
so much longer
when the cold wind
blows.
Arrival
Heading out late and arriving nearly the next day, I came to the middle of nowhere and continued driving an hour more. The lights from the city faded with snow blindness often subverting scenery. Light pollution bounced off of the clouds, leaving a hazy tumult of dim reddish pink. The color gets tangled up in the white void of sky that seamlessly melds with the earth to create a blank white canvass, an endless land of sky.
The hours ticked away- sometimes steadily with the hum of the engine, other times slowly-minutes buried somewhere between the ice already frozen to the ground and snow freshly falling.
Dwindling Night-Days
Days in Reykjavik come to an abrupt end. Sadness doesn’t really figure into this departure because I have steadily lost friends, who have spun rapidly into my life and then just as quickly have flung themselves out of this revolving door country. There is no one left to mourn really, no reason to stick around, and I feel too tired to go through the motions of getting to know people again just to have them disappear.
So it’s off… to throw myself into an adventure. Like everything else tried in life, the romantic, wandering heart yearns and searches. Perhaps never to find what it is looking for. To grasp those wispy elements of people, not all but some, and hold tight to the beautiful moments. Slow, slower, slowest, slowly stopping- then grinding to a halt. To touch the earth, sweat and pour the preponderance of thoughts into something else. Distance and transience forever locked into my life.
The heart leads, when the mind wanders. Those left behind become stronger with each loss, but not, no never, immune.
Bits of Morning Poetry
Paper cutouts and plastic dreams
within which I lift the layers
ever so carefully
with the bated breath
of momentum clutched
between clenched teeth.
Getting Drunk is like Going Back to Childhood…
Working overnight at a hostel is an anthropological dream. You get to witness the people who are up and checking in at late hours of the night and sometimes it just ain´t pretty.
Tonight there came what I thought was a couple, but what turned out to be a pair of friends (yes, I also raised my eyebrow). This doesn´t bother me: I´ve just kind of gotten used to Reykjavik being THE city for getting wasted and sleeping around. But the look of embarassment on the guy´s face was enough to give me pause. His apparent lack of interest in his lady friend was sad to witness.
The woman was approaching middle age and clinging to shreds of her youth. There´s nothing wrong with aging, but denying your age can be downright disheartening for other people to witness. Smiling drunkenly, the woman began to speak and say things that my five your old sister would find unsophisticated. Asking me where I am from and then blurting out that her ex boyfriend was also from New York reminded me of a child saying what their daddy does. It was sad. A little pathetic. But most of all, it made me not want to be her.
You can´t be that desperate to pass the time, right? The answer is that in Reykjavik, as the wintry nights reach in to strangle the day, alcohol is a preoccupation. The routine is quite simple. Start drinking at home on one of three days: Thursday, Friday, Satruday. Get sufficiently smashed and wander into the downtown (101). Continue drinking (or bring a hip flask if you are clever). Find someone to spend the night with, take them home, sleep with them, likely wake up and slink out hoping not to run into anyone on your way home. Have a nasty daylong hangover. Shower, repeat.
Iceland’s Times (the start of a play)
Two women sit in a cafe talking. Marjorie is a motherly figure in her late 50s, with gray streaks in her shoulder length brown hair. Kylie is in her mid 20s, with short dirty blonde hair. Marjorie: “You’re just arrogant, plain and simple.” Kylie: “Sorry… what?” Marjorie: “Arrogant. It’s simple arrogance and a bit of pride thrown in…” Kylie: “Because I want to get paid?” Marjorie: “Because you think your work is good enough. There are people lining up to get your job, just hungry for the chance to… you’ll see.” Kylie: “OK, let me get this straight: I’m arrogant because I demand payment which has been delayed for over a month. I’m arrogant because I value myself enough as a person and a writer to…” Marjorie: “There! You’re doing it again” Kylie: “Um… alright. Look, I think I’m perfectly justified going there and demanding payment. What’s right is right… they delayed things for long enough and I need to pay my rent.” Marjorie: “Well, you should have realized that you need another job if you want to have this job.” Kylie: “Excuse me?” Marjorie: She sighs in exasperation, blowing her bangs out of the way. “We all have to get second jobs to stay on with the magazine. I have to pay the bills by duping tourists into taking overpriced tours that I book through a travel agency. I also work there on a freelance basis.” As Marjorie speaks, Kylie looks progressively more shocked by the situation. Kylie: “And this freelance travel agency pays on time?” Marjorie: “Well, not really…” Kylie: “So, you’re left with two jobs that don’t pay, how do you survive?” Marjorie: Smiling at this question as though it’s completely obvious. “Well, I’ve got the lateness timed to a tee. On average Iceland’s Times pays one and a half months late and the travel agency pays three weeks late. I was hired at the travel agency three weeks after Iceland’s Times. That was when Iceland’s Times was already two weeks late, so it meant a month til I was paid. That means I can count of Iceland’s Times paying a month after my hiring at the travel agency and the travel agency paying two weeks after Iceland’s Times.” Kylie’s mouth drops open and her eyes widen at this prospect, as Marjorie continues speaking. Kylie: “The point is they are late.” At this point Marjorie gets angry, but controls it by continuing her explanation. Marjorie: “You just need to lower your standards. You can’t just expect that Einar will pay you on time…” Kylie: interrupting “Really? When I can’t pay my rent I just have to go into his office and beg all the time? Sorry, but I value myself too much for that.” Marjorie: “It will backfire on you.” Kylie: “Oh thanks, that’s what I need right now.” The younger woman grabs her bag and leaves some money on the table. In a sarcastic tone: “I appreciate your wonderful advice and will make sure to schedule two jobs which pay late so that I can earn enough money to LIVE. Sorry but I have more self worth than that. If you think that’s arrogance then I have it.” With that she walks out of the coffee shop slamming the door.
Scene 2: Office interior, Kylie knocks loudly on the office door. Inside of the office is a man in his 60s dressed in a suit. Something is a bit off about how he looks…
Kylie: “Einar, I need you to pay me what you owe.” Einar: “Just… moment. I on phone.” The man speaks in halting English, often sounding breathless as though he’s run up several flights of stairs. Kylie: “NO! I have waited for over a month and this is ridiculous! I need to pay my rent!” Kylie: opens the door and storms into the office. Einar holds up his finger rudely and gestures to the phone. Einar: Am on phone. Kylie: Yes, I can SEE you’re on the phone, but this is also important. Einar: Take seat. Will be a few minutes. Einar: continues talking on the phone and fiddling on the computer, pecking at the keys distractedly. He intentionally avoids the flustered gaze of Kylie. Kylie: I have tried to speak to you civilly: in person, on the phone, and through email. I am done with civility because you simply don’t seem to understand it.” Einar: makes a frustrated gesture that he’s still on the phone. Kylie: OK, great, made to wait AGAIN by you. I know that you’ve lost several staff members because you don’t pay and refuse to listen to people but this is ridiculous… Kylie goes on a monologue for about a minute and Einar gets up from his chair and walks towards her. He stands near the chair and looks at her. Einar: Am on phone. He takes her elbow and guides her to the door. Kylie is too shocked to know how to react. Her expression is one of surprise and revulsion at Einar touching her. Once the door is shut she stands there horrified and a slow anger grows over her. Then, suddenly an idea strikes her and she rushes to the phone. Kylie: The embassy! Why didn’t I think of that sooner! They’ll help me take care of this. She continues speaking as she dials the numbers in a relieved tone. It will be solved before lunch! We see and hear Kylie explaining her problem to the embassy and then breathing a notable sigh of relief as she nods her head and speaks her agreement several times. She is still on the phone when Einar beckons her into his office. Einar: Come we talk now. Kylie enters the office still on the phone with her embassy. She speaks loudly and enthusiastically so that Einar hears every word. Kylie: Really, I can? Oh that’s great! I have RIGHTS as a freelancer. Wonderful. Even though we have no contract. I can sue? Well, I don’t know if that’s necessary… maybe he’ll listen to reason. Thanks, you too. Bye. During this period Einar has been nervously toying with objects on his desk. Kylie: That was the embassy. What NICE people. Einar: Why you call them? Kylie: Well, I wanted to know what to do about the problem. Einar: looks confused Einar: What problem? Kylie: YOU. Einar: I? Kylie: Yes, you don’t pay. Einar: No, I pay… later. Kylie: Later is all I ever hear from you. You say the magazine comes out in August and it’s November when it’s published. You tell the writers to wait one more week and then another and another. The world does not work on your schedule. She starts massaging her temples. I simply need to be paid, rent is due today and I can’t continue waiting like this. Einar: I pay you half money last month. Kylie: You paid LESS than half of the money last month. Einar: I pay you. Kylie: Right, but you know rent is monthly Einar: Yes… Einar fails to understand what this has to do with him. You have no other job? Kylie: No, you wanted me to write and that takes time. I also go to university, you know. I wrote almost 30 articles for you and had them in ON TIME and CORRECTED by deadline. So, where’s the money? Einar: We have none. Kylie: You have ZERO cash in you bank account. Einar: Correct. Kylie: How do you plan to pay? Einar: When client pays we, we pay you. Kylie: What if the client never pays? Einar is ominously silent. Kylie: Look I’m not leaving this office until you give me something. Einar: looks tired and leans forward on his desk. Einar: OK, I give $50. Kylie: laughs. Kylie: So you do have something? Einar: From own account. Kylie: It’s from your personal account? Einar: nods. Kylie: Won’t take less than $200. Einar: $100. Kylie: Deal, but if the rest is not paid by tomorrow… I’m coming back. Einar: I so nice give you this money. Kylie: Yes, you are a sweetheart really. Thanks for paying me a fraction of what you owe. Einar: I very nice man. Einar puts his head in his hand and repeats this phrase several times as Kylie exits and the scene ends.
